As women, we often find ourselves feeling like we have to do it all and do it perfectly. We try to balance our professional lives with our roles as mothers, partners, friends, and community members, all while trying to maintain a sense of self and sanity. With so much on our plates, it's no wonder that many of us struggle with imposter syndrome.
Imposter syndrome is the feeling that you are a fraud, that you don't deserve your accomplishments or position, and that you will be "found out" as inadequate. This feeling is not unique to women, nor is it reserved for those who lack experience or education. Imposter syndrome can strike anyone, regardless of their background or achievements. As a matter of fact, if you suffer from imposter syndrome, the more achievements you have the more you feel like an imposter.
Recognize that no one has it all figured out. (not even me) Even the most successful and accomplished individuals have doubts and insecurities. It's part of being human. However,
if left unchecked, imposter syndrome can hold us back and prevent us from reaching our full potential.
I used to struggle with imposter syndrome myself, and it was especially bad when I gave presentations. If the presentation went well and people praised me for it, I would feel even worse because it made me believe that I was just a really good actor. Everyone was believing that I was good at my job when I was just faking it.
It wasn't until I started to actively challenge these negative thoughts that I began to make progress in overcoming my imposter feelings. I stopped and asked myself, what would happen if it were true that I was bad at my job? How were targets not just being met, but being surpassed? Why was my team only ever full of kind words for me? How had I climbed the corporate ladder in the first place? How was I able to pay my bills?
As I began to answer these questions, I realized that I was being full of myself to think that I had been fooling people for over 20 years. (I mean, I’m a good actor but that there would have had to be Oscar-worthy.) There was more tangible proof that I was actually good at my job than there was evidence to support my imposter feelings.
I learned that imposter syndrome is just a feeling and not something that I could actually prove. I could choose to let it hold me back, or I could choose to challenge it and move forward with confidence. It wasn't easy, but by focusing on my strengths and accomplishments, and reminding myself of my capabilities, I was able to overcome my imposter syndrome, start taking steps towards my big passion goals ( more on those another time) and finally start to feel like I was moving towards my purpose. Don’t get me wrong, Im not saying that I don’t ever feel like an imposter. Even while writing this post I have heard that voice in my head say “Who are you to write about imposter syndrome, what do you know, who is even going to read this?” The difference now is that I’m able to recognize it, challenge it and most importantly keep moving forward despite it.
So how can we overcome imposter syndrome? Here are a few tips:
Acknowledge and name your imposter feelings. When you start to feel like a fraud, take a moment to recognize what's happening. Say to yourself, "I'm feeling like an imposter right now." This can help you separate yourself from the feeling and gain some perspective.
Talk to someone about your feelings. It can be helpful to talk to a trusted friend or colleague about your imposter feelings. They may be able to provide some reassurance and perspective that you can't see on your own.
Recognize your accomplishments. Take stock of what you have achieved and remind yourself of the hard work and effort that went into those accomplishments. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small they may seem.
Reframe your thoughts. Instead of thinking, "I'm a fraud and everyone will find out," try reframing your thoughts to something more positive and realistic, like, "I may not have all the answers, but I am capable and willing to learn."
Give yourself permission to make mistakes. Remember that making mistakes is a natural part of learning and growing. Don't be too hard on yourself when things don't go as planned.
Focus on progress, not perfection. Instead of striving for perfection, focus on making progress toward your goals. Celebrate small wins and keep moving forward.
Imposter syndrome can be a challenging and debilitating feeling, and Im convinced it is responsible for those Sunday night waves of anxiety many of us get thinking about work the next day. It's important to recognize that imposter syndrome does not define us. By acknowledging and addressing our imposter feelings, we can overcome them and reach our full potential. Remember, no one has it all figured out, and if you feel like an imposter, it's likely because you're intelligent enough to know there's always room for improvement. Embrace the journey and keep pushing forward. You got this!